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Send April 9, 2007 2:48PM (UTC)Dear Cary,I have a 13-year-old son (seventh grade) who has been visiting gay porno sites (two times that I know about). I've been able to see the listings from the Web site logs.
I'm not sure what to think about this. Last night when I tried to talk to him about this he denied it was him. I'm positive it was him because he was the only one home at the time. His two younger brothers (ages 12 and 7) were at lacrosse and soccer practice. I didn't push too hard and told him that I trust him and went over the rules of the computer and how dangerous the Internet can be.
I have software blockers on all their logins so they don't have access to sexual content, but I didn't add this to my access and I didn't log off when I went to work in the morning. This is how he was able to get on those sites. I know I have to have another conversation with him but I'm not sure what I should say. He's a great kid, does well in school, is a good athlete and had what you'd call a girlfriend not too long ago.
Mostly a lot of text messaging and to the movies a few times with other kids. He no longer goes out with her. I think it's because she broke up with him; that's what my sixth-grader told me. He seemed a little upset about that, but nothing overly dramatic - first love kind of thing.
So I have mixed signals.So what should I think about the gay porn sites? Normal adolescent curiosity or something more?
Bryan Charles Kocis (May 28, 1962 – January 24, 2007), also known as Bryan Phillips, was a director of gay pornographic films and founder of Cobra Video, a gay porn film studio. Kocis pleaded guilty to one count of sexual abuse of a child. He was charged with child pornography, and transportation of a minor for sexual. Jun 29, 2017 The latest Tweets from Gay Porno (@xxpornogays). I don't own the pics and gay videos. I'm always horny.
I don't think so, but I don't want to push him back if he's not ready to talk about this. I told my wife last night and she's not sure what to say either. She doesn't think he's gay but certainly thinks visiting these types of Web sites isn't normal.Some direction or insight would be much appreciated. Concerned DadDear Concerned Dad,To paraphrase a song from the 1960s, I'm not but there's a whole lot of times I wish I could say I wasn't straight!
I mean, we straight people have to really step up on this whole homosexuality thing. We walk around like we're the normal ones and everybody else is, like, different. But just think about it. Like, on a gut level, remember when you were 13? It was weird, right? Getting hair, and having urges, and wondering about girls and jobs and the future, and wondering, wondering, wondering. Take a deep breath.
A posture of utter humility before the mystery and grandeur of life is appropriate. It's going to be OK.And also just generally reassuring kids about all this nonsense is appropriate too, don't you think? So could you just tell the kid that you love him and that how we develop sexually is just one part of who we are, and that however you develop it's completely and totally fine?
Could you just tell him that you were 13 once and you remember it's a very weird and uncomfortable time, and that though you have rules in your house your No. 1 rule is that you love your kids and you're there for them? We can't pretend to know in all cases who our kids really are or what's right for them. They just landed here. They're trying to figure out the game. A lot of the rules look very weird.